Monday, December 12, 2011

Recovery Sucks

For the past five days I've been laid up in bed.

Okay, not laid up. Laid down!

I've been laying flat on my back with my legs extended and my head down for the past five days.

And it's been torture.

My surgery was a success and there was no need to burn any extra nerves around my heart. But it still sucked because I had four very large, very long catheters in my groin and it was damn painful.

Add in the fact that I threw up as they took two of them out and caused a little bit of damage on my insides.

And it was a lovely mess.

After my surgery (procedure, whatever you call it) I had to lay flat for four hours to make sure my catheter areas didn't bust open.

Four hours after laying flat on my back, with some major back pain, I got up and started bleeding out everywhere.

Needless to say, I was freaked out of my mind.

And there was blood everywhere.

The nurses were able to toss me on a bed and climb on top of me to stop the blood flow (seriously, a lot of blood poured out... I still freak out about the amount) and it was back on my back for another two hours with a monstrous pressure bandage on my leg.

When it was time to go, I was freaked out and made myself a mess by getting dizzy and having a mini panic attack. I was so worried that I was going to start bleeding again that I drove myself (and my nurse) crazy.

Finally, I was able to go home and was put in bed and wasn't allowed to do anything for myself.

Nothing.

I couldn't do a thing, not even go to the bathroom alone. I was waited on hand and foot, which sounds like fun but I'm a do-it-yourself kinda gal and hate not being able to get my own drink of water.

Now it's day five and I actually managed to get up by myself and even got to sit on the couch.

It was heaven.

Of course, it wore me the f out and I took a three hour nap to recover.

And recovery is great, but it still sucks because I have no energy to do a  thing and I feel so weak. I just want to get back to normal. Back to running, back to taking care of my girls and back to the holiday spirit.

I'll get there, eventually.

4 comments:

Jackie @ MomJovi said...

Oh you poor thing! I always say I wish I had a day to just lay in bed but that's not the way to make it happen. I'd be freaking out too about all of it, but especially the feeling of helplessness. But just keep trying to remind yourself the reason you did it -- for the long run. And in the grand scheme of things, these five days are nothing compared to the (hopefully!) benefits of the procedure. Hang in there!

Carrie with Children said...

*hugs* Sounds like it's been rough. I've been thinking about you. Continue to rest and let others take care of you! xoxoxo

Doodle741 said...

You will back to normal in NO time!! You almost have a full week of recovery knocked out!

(The blood thing would have freaked me out, too!!)

Sara

Erika said...

That sounds scary! I'm glad you are starting to feel better. I know it's hard, but take it easy!