All About Me Me Me

This is my 91 post since starting this blog and originally, I had planned to do my big 100 post as the 100 Things You Were Just Dying to Know About Me! But I thought about it and figured who the hell wanted to read a long ass post like that?

I would hate to write it as well! Talk about a never-ending post, huh?

So I decided that I would take the next ten posts and give you a little bit at a time. Good idea, huh?

Okay, so I present to you 100 Things You Were Just Dying to Know About Me: Part 1

1- I am a compulsive doodler. I can't leave a blank piece of paper alone. I feel the need to cover every inch of it with smiley faces, flowers, sayings, etc.

2- I prefer driving old Ford pick-up trucks to the fancier cars of today.

3- I do my husband's homework for him.

4- I hate flying in small planes... so much that I threw up all over myself once when my husband took me flying on our anniversary (How Romantic, huh?).

5- I always visualize falling when I'm running.

6- I'm addicted to Coke, McDonald's Egg McMuffin Sandwiches and Chocolate.

7- I hate wearing shoes.

8- I live on a horse farm and don't like horses very much.

9- I miss my grandfather very much.

10- I always take pictures of my feet so I can documents where my feet have traveled.

:)

There you go. Part One of 100 Things You Were Just Dying to Know About Me.

Exciting, huh?

Oh Lord

The other day I was working on a lease agreement for the farm, when my laptop's screen went black.

Black as in the kiss of death black.

I tried to restart it and got the message: No bootable devices.

Huh?

So I dig out my manuals and discs and hunt through them hoping for something, anything, that will help me solve this problem. Of course, the manual was no help and the disc were crap. I did find a picture of a disc from Dell that said I didn't need a device cd or a restore cd b/c the programs were installed on my laptop.

The laptop that refuses to pass the screen that says: NO BOOTABLE DEVICES.

Yeah, how is that PC Restore icon going to help me if I can't get to it?

Hhhhmmmmmmmmmmmmm??

Yeah, so I'm screwed. If my laptop crashes I lose EVERYTHING. The pictures and videos of Roo for the past four months, my Internet favorites, my manuals, EVERYTHING!

:(

I'm praying my IT guy can help me... but I'm having problems finding him of course.

Egh, pray for my laptop girls, please.

Thankfully I have a desktop on the farm that has Internet connection. :) There is one shining button in this mess.

Enjoy your shopping today!

Terrible Two?

A while back I taught my daughter a silly gesture that is now coming back to haunt me.

No, I didn't teach her the finger... yet.

I taught her how to blow air through her closed lips and make a silly sound. When she learned this cute little trick, I was in awe. Both of us would collapse into giggles when either one of us did it. It was a never-ending game of fun for us and a great way to pass the time if we were bored.

Of course, now she loves to do it all the time. Especially during dinner.

She thinks it's the funniest thing in the world to make this noise when she has a full mouth of food. This morning it was blueberry applesauce and very cold. Tonight at dinner it was peas.

I've created a monster.

The problem isn't that she's being creative and having fun. The problem is she's wasting food! No, the problem is I'm not sure how to react to this. Half of me is giggling along with her, but the other part of me kinda irked that she's doing this while we're supposed to be eating. I'm not sure if I should discipline her. I've tried to ignore her, I've tried to tell her "No" and I've even had Daddy step in and tell her it's not a smart idea.

She could care less.

Should I?

Fashion Smashion

I've been harassed about my fashion sense for years.


But I rejoice in it... what is wrong with olive green shoes and christmas striped socks?




That's right, nothing.

Crash, Bang, BOOM!

This was a helluva weekend for Miss Roo.

This weekend was the proof that she inherited my klutzy gene.

It started on Saturday when I was brushing her hair. She has a little step stool she stands on while I clean her up for the day. Well, that day she decided she didn't want to stand still while I pulled her hair into pigtails. Before I could react, she'd slipped off the stool. She managed to slam her chin into the counter top corner and bite her tongue in the process.

There was blood everywhere!

That evening while we were tooling around the barn in our truck, Roo was standing on the seat (Yes, I know my child should be in a car seat, even when we're just driving around in the pastures) and Mr. Me had to hit the brakes in order to avoid hitting something, she flew forward and slammed her face into the dash. Thankfully(!!!), she only bruised her forehead and got a little cut above her eye.

Then, to top it off, yesterday while she and I were enjoying the weather down by the pond, she fell face first off a chair, right into the dirt. Nothing like a mouthful of dirt to make a toddler happy.

During all of this, I was right with her. I was right there, but I wasn't fast enough to prevent any of these accidents. Sometimes I feel like a horrible Mom b/c my reaction time is so slow. All it takes is a second for something to happen to her. and it takes me two seconds to react. I truly do feel horrible.

My little nugget is a strong chicken though, minutes after everything that happened, she's up and running around without a care in the world. Thank goodness someone in this family is tough!

Dear Twilight the Movie,

Dear Twilight the Movie,


I wish you well on your opening day. I hope you crank out enough ticket sales to warant a sequel or two or three. I shamefully admit, I am dying to come and watch you. Me, the 28 year old amongst the sea of screaming tweens. I am dying to experience the chemistry between Edward and Bella, to watch the action scenes unfold and point out parts of the book. I feverishly pray that my heart will twist and jump just as it did while reading the books. I want to compare and contrast you to the books. I want to observe all the details, take in every inch of the scenry and commit it to memory so when I re-read the books I can picture it all.

I would love nothing more than to sit down in a cold dark room with you, snuggle into the plush velvet seats and wrap myself in a thick sweater. I want to gorge on candy and soda while losing myself in your plot. I feverishly wish I could cry with emotion you and gasp in suspense when you surprise me.

Regretfully, I don't see this happening anytime soon. The absence of a trusty babysitter and lack of funding prohibits my wishes to see you in person. I pray I don't get antsy and search you out on the internet. I hope I have the reserve to wait to see you in all your glory, on a 20 foot screen.

Please, be patient with me.

Thank you,
SuZ


P.S. I swear I'm not obesessive with you, I just needing a little excitement in my life that doesn't revolve around snot, poop or tamper-tantrums.

Wish List

Since I broke my vow already today, I figured why not continue with good tidings?

My Mom called and complined that I told her what Roo would like for Christmas and what Mr. Me would like for Christmas, but nothing about what I wanted. "What do you want?" She asked.

After a long pause, I told her that I had no clue.

So why Roo napped, I put together my dream list and thought I'd share.

Here's my #1 pretty please. A Canon Rebel XSI

A pretty new iMac and iPod


And what girl doesn't want a 2.5 carat Cushion Cut ring?

Big Fat Liar

I swore I wouldn't do this.





I lied.





I'm a big fat liar.

But when Grandma send you a huge package and you try to hide the pretty tree from a 20 month old child, it ends bad.

It ends with a Christmas tree in your house before Thanksgiving.

My 1st Award!!!

My new bloggy pal, Jaime was kind enough to give me this:


Now, I can't read a lick of Spanish but I'm pretty sure it's something good.

:)

Jaime tells me: "This blog invests and believes the PROXIMITY - nearness in space, time and relationships! These blogs are exceedingly charming. These kind bloggers aim to find and be friends. They are not interested in prizes or self-aggrandizement. Our hope is that when the ribbons of these prizes are cut, even more friendships are propagated. Please give more attention to these writers! Deliver this award to eight bloggers who must choose eight more and include this cleverly-written text into the body of their award."

Isn't that just the nicest thing???

Now I want to share the love with some of my favorites by passing it forward and sharing some love.

I bestow this award to:

Mom of Two
My Crazy Life with 4 Kids
Sippy Cup Chardonnay
Mommy in Pink
Pink Ink
The Fun House
Sunshine and Lemonade
C'est La Vie This Is The Life I Choose

Yeah for bloggy lovin'!

The Search Begin

Christmas is exactly 36 Days 11 Hours 11 Minute away.

Last night I realized just how quickly those minutes will tick away and I started to panic. What the hell am I going to get everyone for Christmas? When I sat down to write out the names of everyone in my family, my eyes just got bigger and bigger. When the hell did my family get so large?? And when did my wallet get so small?

I have 20+ people to purchase gifts for and that doesn't even include my hubby and my daughter.

Did I mention I'm a SAHM and possess no income (besides the 46 cents I've made since joining BlogHer)?

The plan (so far) is to purchase gifts for those who hate homemade gifts (i.e. nephews and nieces) and everyone else gets something made with L-O-V-E.

Now, I'm a creative person and being married to a fantastic photographer comes in handy, but will everyone really covet the black and white photographs of the Roo? Or should I get really creative and break out the paintbrushes and canvases? I could sew?

Oh, such decisions.

If I Hit Him With A Shovel, Will I Be Arrested?

So, I have a dog... an annoying dog that manages to bark at the most in-opportune time. Like when I'm trying to get my daughter to take her nap, he breaks out into a round of barking so loud that I feel the window rattle.

And no matter how many times I run outside and threaten him bodily harm if he doesn't shut up, he starts right back up as soon as I close the door. I swear, he barks at everything! A squirrel squeaks five miles away and he goes off. A leaf falls in the pasture and he thinks it's World War III!

I'm not kidding, our bug man (the same bug man we've had for years) comes over and he barks for a solid hour.

I admit that I did throw the shovel at him, I missed (of course), but he looked scared for two seconds before barking at me some more.

Maybe I should dig his voice box out with my fingers, maybe that will shut him up.

Probably not.

Damn dog pisses me off!

Day Four

Today is day four of weaning.

So far, it's been okay, with the exception of day two. Day one, three and four were great. Day two was a bad day. Not for Roo, not in the least. But day two for me was HORRIBLE b/c my boobs were achingly full (is this too much info?), so full that it was painful. I couldn't even pick up my daughter without cringing in pain. And I'm a klutz by nature, so I managed to impale my boobs on everything in a ten mile radius.

Today, my boobs are doing so much better. No where near as full as day two, or even day three for that matter. It seems they are playing along just nicely and can read my brain waves (It's possible, right?).

We're down to nursing two times a day and she is handling it like a champ, much better than myself. I make sure to hide my boppy pillow, have a sippy cup on hand and have a full bag of distraction tricks. Occasionally, she will crawl up into bed and search for the boppy pillow so as soon as I see this, I snatch her up and take her outside to play.

I'm thinking that next week we'll try and drop the naptime feeding... this could be a disaster b/c she nurses to sleep a lot. I'm not looking forward to this.. at all.

Here's to hoping, right?

20 Months

Dear Roo,

It seems like I just wrote your 19 month old letter yesterday. I tell myself every month to be prepared that time with you flies, and every month I forget. Maybe I'm just in denial? Maybe I don't want you to grow up so fast. Maybe I want to keep you as my little chicken nugget forever?

Or maybe not... Maybe not b/c I am so damn excited about watching you grow up. My favorite thing about this process is re-discovering everything through your eyes. As an old lady, I tend to take for granted all the simplest things in life. Normally, I don't look at a butterfly fluttering by like you do. I don't stop and examine the texture of every tree in the front yard. But lately, as you discover, I discover. I get down in the dirt with you and let every grain of sand fall between my fingertips. I stop and watch as planes fly above our heads and chase grasshoppers as they bounce through the yard. I love watching the sheer, simply joy that animates your face as you watch cats stretch in the sunlight. I share your giggles when you tease the dogs with sticks.

With you, I slow down and take the time to enjoy life and I thank you for that. Thank you for teaching me that life isn't about making it from one place to the next in the smallest amount of time. Thank you for showing me that stomping on perfectly built sand castles is fun. Thank you for dancing in the middle of the road with me and twirling in circles until we're both dizzy.

Thank you for being my daughter.

Love,
Mommy

Sunshine & Lemonade Contest!

Okay, so you know I'm a huge fan of Twilight and you know I'm quite excited about the movie to come out next week. While pursuing my favorite blogs, I stumbled across Kat's blog which posted her weekend fun contest.

This yummy yummy prize is a must have for any Twilight fan... serious. The booty of this contest is enough to make you drool!!!

Go check her out and enter yourself.

Handmade with Love

As kids, every year when Christmas would roll around we'd get really excited. My sister, brother and I would sharpen our pencils and make out our Christmas Lists for Santa. We'd have the Toys R Us Big Book of Toys and the JCPenny's catalog as reference materials and sales flyers with hastily circled items that had caught our fancies.

The three of us would work really hard on our letters. We wanted every word, every picture, every plea to Santa to be perfect. The more perfect the letter, the better chance we'd get everything on our list.

Once completed, we'd signed our names and our mother would "mail" them off to Santa Claus. The remaining days until Christmas were spent sitting by our freshly decorated tree, staring at our stockings and whispering about all the new, cool toys we were going to get, especially b/c as far as Mom knew, we had been angels this year.

When Christmas would come, we would devour the presents under the tree while our parents excitedly took pictures. In our minds we were mentally ticking off our lists and making sure we got everything we asked for.

Of course, we didn't get everything we'd hoped for and as we tore open our gifts from our Grandma C. we found ourselves frowning as we examined homemade gifts. Unhappily, we unwrapped handmade ornaments of yellow stars, or dolls that looked like Cabbage Patch dolls, but weren't. The quilts made with odd patches had been a disappointment.

We would quickly put those gifts aside, and feverishly look for better presents under the tree. We never noticed the looks our parents exchanged as Grandma C's gifts were tossed aside in favor of talking robots that had flashy lights and Barbie dolls that had pink shoes.

Looking back now, I realize what selfish, ungrateful brats we were for not favoring the gifts made with love and especially made just for us, but adoring the toys that required batteries and tended to break in less than a month.

Looking back now, we never thought those quilts, ornaments and dolls would still be in existence while the much desired toys at the time are long gone and forgotten.

Looking back, I wish I could have meant those thank you letters to my Grandmother, not just written them hastily before rushing back to play with my favorite toys.

Now I realize the error of youthful thinking and every night as I slip under the oddly colored patch quilt on my bed, I think of the love my Grandmother put into making this quilt. I also think about the homemade, handmade gifts I've made for my daughter and hope that she'll realize that gifts made with love are the most precious of them all.

This weeks blog blast is in part to Klutz books and the Parents Bloggers Network.

Painful

Today I made the decision to wean my daughter.

And I have to admit, I made this decision with tears in my eyes.

It is a very difficult decision to make, but I've decided to give my boobs back to their rightful owner.

I also have to admit, I am too sad to write a full post today.

Please bare with me while I mourn this relationship.

Guilt

Occasionally, I get "uncomfortable" when breast-feeding. And when I say occasionally, I mean it's only happened five times in the last 20 months.

And when I say "uncomfortable" I mean, I get antsy when she nurses. I get this odd feeling, like I have to get her off my boob in record time or I get squeamish. My stomach gets nervous and jumpy, like I'm having an anxiety attack.

Does that make any sense?

I always feel so guilty when this happens, but I can't help it. It comes out of no-where, blindsides me that a brickwall. I am so caught off guard that I don't know how to handle it. My whole body feels it and I find myself tapping my toes and twiddling my fingers to distract myself from the feeling.

I have no idea what this means and since it's only happened five times out of the last trillion times I've nursed her, I never thought to ask my doctor.

Or maybe I never asked (or told anyone this) b/c I'm embarrassed. Embarrassed that my beautiful little daughter could cause such turmoil in me.

...

...

...

Glued I tell ya, Glued.

Some of you have commented on my absence... and most of you know exactly where I was.

Glued to the book Twilight.

I picked it up Sunday and stayed up until 330am to finish it.

Yes, all 500 pages of it in one night.

Yesterday I was so thirsty (ha ha ha) for more, that I ran out to Target and bought the second one New Moon.

And I didn't come unglued from that one until 400pm today.

Needless to say, I loved both books (the first more than the second).

Needless to say, I'm DYING for my friend Karen to mail me the remaining two books of the series.

I haven't had this much appreciation and desire for a book since I read Gone With the Wind twelve years ago. Sure, I've read a million or more books since then and yes, I've loved many of them. But these books are HAUNTING me. Literally! I think about them all the time, I'm googling them, I'm watching the movie trailers.

I feel like I'm 10 years ago again obsessed with the NKOTB, but it's with books this time.

And maybe I'm a tad bit embarrassed about it, maybe, b/c it's a kids book. This is not a classic book. This is not Shakespeare or Austin. This is a kids book!

Hm....

Maybe I've just lost my mind?

Or maybe Stephenie Meyers is simply a genius?

Your opinion, please.

Finally?

I've had friends ragging on me about this book for months. They insisted I would love it. They demanded I read it. They told me I had had had to buy it.

And I resisted.

I resisted their pleas for months.

Today, I caved.

Today, I found the book at a discount store and thought: Why not?

So, am I going to enjoy it, or not?

Lazy Day

What better way to spend a Sunday than watching redbox movies and creating my own Muppet?

Not One Single Warning

When I was pregnant I was given advice about every single thing to do as a new mom. I was told which detergent to use, which binky (pacifier) was best, the right kind of lotions, soaps, wipes, diapers. I was given speeches about socks, crayons, safety issues. Nothing went uncovered... except the love.

No one warned me how much I would love you.

No one warned me about how I would look at you and my stomach would erupt with butterflies.

Not one single person told me that 1 year, 7 months, 3 weeks and 2 days later, I would find myself gazing at you and be so in love with you that I want to cry.

And oh how I love you... I love you so much that I want to move mountains for you, I want to make the world a better place for you. I love you so much that I don't want to deny you the simplest request. No matter what it is, your love is worth whatever it costs.

Promise me that if I'm still this sappy and weepy over you when your three, or six, or eighteen, you'll let your old Mommy hug you a few seconds longer than you want, or let her smoother you in kisses when your friends aren't looking and when you're eighteen and we're at odds with one another over stupid things, please remember how much I love you.

Sleep Issues

Sleep issues have plagued me since the day Miss Roo was born. While it took 12 months for the little chicken to sleep through the night, she rarely falls asleep on her own. Typically, she falls asleep in my arms after (or during) nursing. This routine of ours doesn't bother me much, but I have a sinking feeling that I'm setting her up for some kind of ... disaster. Like she'll be 13 years old and refuse to fall asleep without my aid.

So when Kristen posted about Sprout and their web-cast hosted by Jenni Waldburger, a pediatric sleep specialist, family therapist and cofounder of Sleepy Planet. I decided to sign up and see if I could fix this problem... nip it in the bid.

The web-cast will take place on November 12, at 2pm EST. You can register online to participate and maybe, just maybe, your sleeping issues will be solved!

Here's to hoping.

MomDot

One of my favorite places MomDot, is having a "contest" for the top 50 Mom Blogs. You can go here and nominate your favorite reads.

It's Starting To Pay Off

My writing is starting to pay off... thanks to a recent blog blast.

Check it out baby!

This is what I contributing to the family. :)

Mr. Me

Dear Mr. Me,

Today amongst all the hussle and bustle of daily life, I had a flash back of the past. Rewind ten years back and you find you and I dancing together under the huge oak tree in the front yard. There was no music playing. I can still smell the crispness of the cold air, the feel of your camo jacket beneath my fingertips, the wind tickling my skin. There wasn't the normal crowd of friends lingering about. There was just you and I, the silence of the night, and the stars above. We swayed together, my head buried in the crook of your neck and your arms around me tight.

It was the single most romantic moment of my life and right then and there, I fell in love with you.

Fast forward to today and to all the craziness of our life. Baby, dogs, family, jobs, etc... and in the middle of the madness, I can look at you and remember the moments we've shared and I love you even more than I thought humanly possible.

Here's to many, many more romantic moments and continuing to fall in love.

Love,
Your devoted wife (and baby's mama).

Me

Where the Hell did Thanksgiving go?

Since last week I've seen a constant stream of Christmas commercials on TV. Gifts to buy, shows to watch, the whole she'bang. I can't even walk into my favorite stores without being bombarded with twinkling lights, fake snow and cheesy ornaments.

Now, I love Christmas just as much as the next, but I happen to enjoy Thanksgiving. It seems that big business wants us to slide quickly past November and into full-fledged shopping mode.

But what about yummy turkey and spicy pumpkin pie? What about family sitting down around the table without the pressure of gift giving and just be thankful for each other? Have we forgotten this holiday in favor of the commercial pressure that comes with December?

I'm taking a stand, right here and now. I refuse to participate in ANY Christmas activities until Thanksgiving's feast has digested in my tummy. I will not shop, watch or listen to any Christmas hoopla.

If you need me, I will be dreaming of falling leaves, eating warm dutch apple pies and making pine cone turkeys with glitter.

I Did... Did You?

Glory! Glory! GLORY!

The little nugget that is my daughter has recently taken a liking to a 1130 bedtime. Yes, you read that right, my 19 month old daughter refuses to shut her eyes before 1130. As you can imagine that leaves me frustrated and, most importantly, E.X.H.A.U.S.T.E.D.

Roo has been a night owl for many months now. While all of her play date buddies are out like lights at 830, my child is still wound very tightly at that time.

Normally, Roo stays up with us until 1000pm, where she then crashes and snores until 900am the next morning. I'm cool with this because I've become a night owl along with her and as a result of this, enjoy sleeping in with her.

I can handle 1000pm, 1130pm, not so much. That extra hour and a half makes a mean and cranky mom.

But last night she passed out at 800pm. I was in such shock that I didn't know what to do with myself. I literally say in the bed and just stared at her while she slept. I was thinking she'd pop up at any moment and yell, "FOOLED YOU!" and laugh at me.

But she didn't... thankfully.

Maybe it was the time change. It had her internal clock all screwed up. If so, I plan to take advantage of this glorious opportunity and shot for another 800pm bedtime.

Wish me luck.