So, I have a dog... an annoying dog that manages to bark at the most in-opportune time. Like when I'm trying to get my daughter to take her nap, he breaks out into a round of barking so loud that I feel the window rattle.
And no matter how many times I run outside and threaten him bodily harm if he doesn't shut up, he starts right back up as soon as I close the door. I swear, he barks at everything! A squirrel squeaks five miles away and he goes off. A leaf falls in the pasture and he thinks it's World War III!
I'm not kidding, our bug man (the same bug man we've had for years) comes over and he barks for a solid hour.
I admit that I did throw the shovel at him, I missed (of course), but he looked scared for two seconds before barking at me some more.
Maybe I should dig his voice box out with my fingers, maybe that will shut him up.
Damn dog pisses me off!